At the end of all this we had a bit of a housewarming party. Some of you were there. I found a photo…It was after New Year’s in 1995, and almost marked a year since I was brought to Latvia as a new wife. This was the first adult place I could call home, and while most of the necessities were there (we still didn’t have a washing machine), I was looking forward to filling it with life in every material, physical and spiritual sense of the word.
The party was certainly a start to that, but there was something bigger looming. A few weeks later, I had to leave for an extended stay in Helsinki. I remember crying that day as I got into the car and looked back at the windows of the flat through the curtains I had just made. I had just spent months creating this safe place to soothe our new and sort of feral life; Now I had to leave this home for at least 4 weeks which promised to be an unforgettable, unpredictable, and uncertain period of time. And I knew quite clearly that regardless of how this time played out, when I returned, none of it--my home, my marriage, my whole life--would ever be the same.
The party was certainly a start to that, but there was something bigger looming. A few weeks later, I had to leave for an extended stay in Helsinki. I remember crying that day as I got into the car and looked back at the windows of the flat through the curtains I had just made. I had just spent months creating this safe place to soothe our new and sort of feral life; Now I had to leave this home for at least 4 weeks which promised to be an unforgettable, unpredictable, and uncertain period of time. And I knew quite clearly that regardless of how this time played out, when I returned, none of it--my home, my marriage, my whole life--would ever be the same.
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